Finding Bravery in Ordinary World-Changing
By Elisa Johnston
God's Brave Women - Elisa's Story
I used to think there was one way to change the world.
It was outward. It was expansive. The bigger the better.
Whether I was on an actual soapbox preaching to a crowd on a tiny South Pacific island or cooking meal for an orphanage in Mexico, the less ordinary the better.
That was fine and good until I moved to the richest suburbs in the U.S., home of white picket fences and two-point-five kids. Not only did I not fit in, but my anger at injustices–and others’ indifference to them–was bursting. Throw in an early marriage and some babies, and I was drowning. My life was normal. In many ways to others, it probably appeared perfect. But to me it was far from wonderful. A wrench was thrown into my plans to change the world.
This is when many wonderful mom bloggers will tell you how they went on to find fulfillment and joy as they took care of their homes. And although many women do, I wasn’t one of them. It felt scary and even wrong to long for more–wasn’t homemaking supposed to fulfill me? I desperately wanted to escape my ordinary life, and I desperately wanted to do big meaningful things, like change laws and start orphanages.
"It felt scary and even wrong to long for more–wasn’t homemaking supposed to fulfill me?"
For years I wrestled, bravely doing the right thing, serving my family and holding my responsibilities. And yet while nursing my littles in the wee hours, I would stay up writing papers and blog posts on social issues, like how to help with the refugee crisis, lamenting a school shooting, or compiling advocacy ideas for human trafficking awareness.