Embracing Your Unexpected Life with Courage

By Jenn Soehnlin

God's Brave Women - Jenn's Story

When I learned I was going to become a mother, the excitement was indescribable. I imagined the things I would do with my child, the play dates, the art projects we could do, the books we’d read, and places we would go. When a sweet baby boy was placed in my arms, I was instantly in love and had found a new purpose for my life.

Two years later, we added another precious baby boy to our family. But before I’d even had a chance to get into the swing of being of a mother of two, my two-year-old son received a devastating diagnosis. Within the next two years, both boys would have a dozen diagnoses between them.

My daydreams of motherhood were shattered, replaced with endless therapy appointments, battles with insurance companies and doctors, and an overwhelming loneliness I didn’t know how to handle. My emotional, spiritual, and physical health were deteriorating under the stress. Anxiety and depression took turns settling in and making themselves cozy.

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"But what surprised me the most was the crisis of faith I experienced. Where was God? Why would He do this to me and my boys? Was He really a good God, like I had always believed? And scariest of all, was He even real?"

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But what surprised me the most was the crisis of faith I experienced. Where was God? Why would He do this to me and my boys? Was He really a good God, like I had always believed? And scariest of all, was He even real? If He was real, He felt far away and silent when I needed Him the most.