The Brave Choice to Invite God into Our Pain

By Jodi Rosser

God's Brave Women - Jodi's Story

I will never forget that night, the night my heart was shattered into a thousand pieces. The night my life took an unexpected turn.

Honestly, I did not want to believe what I was hearing. The weight of his words was unbearable. Like a ton of bricks crashing over my body, his heavy words left me shocked and paralyzed. With tears streaming down my face, I ran upstairs to call my accountability partner to share the heartbreaking news. I knew I would not be able to handle this alone. I needed her help.

As the phone was dialing, I remembered our purposeful walks just months before. We were meeting weekly together to walk and pray healing over my marriage. At the time I was truly hopeful that God could heal us, but after hearing this news, I knew my marriage of 15 ½ years was over. When she answered the phone, I burst into tears.

I will never forget the night my hopes and dreams for my family were turned upside down. In my heart, I could not see how I was going to get through this. Lying awake in bed, all I could think about was my kids. Not only was my life going to completely change, but my kids’ lives would be forever changed too. The thought of them having to grow up in a divorced home deeply saddened me. I cried out to God, “How are we going to get through this? I don’t even know what to do.”

Have you ever felt like this? Are you facing some impossible circumstance and don’t know what to do? Does your life feel like it took an unexpected turn?

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"There is something about being taken to a place of heartbreak where you have to choose either to run to God with your pain or run away from God in anger."

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There is something about being taken to a place of heartbreak where you have to choose either to run to God with your pain or run away from God in anger. Alone and heartbroken, I chose to run to God with my pain, every day, every hour or minute if needed. This is what I wrote in my journal that next morning:

God, I truly want to grow from my pain. I don’t want it to break me. I want it to grow me and help me draw closer to You. Only You can give me strength in this nightmare I am living. Only You can turn my tears into hope. I lay this at Your feet. Please take my pain and help me draw closer to You, Your power, Your strength, Your love, and Your comfort. Help me to teach my kids to do that too. Help me be an example to them and give me the strength for another day.

Little did I know how much these brave words would change my life.