By Misty Oerther
God's Brave Women - Misty's Story
After every storm, there comes a rainbow. Thank you Lord for this promise of hope.
October 27, 2015 was as gut wrenching as it was glory-filled in my life. You see, October 27, 2014 was the day, we lost our son - John Karl Oerther VI - on what should have been his first birthday. No one on earth knew how I would react or function, let alone me. Our sweet boy celebrated in heaven, while we “celebrated” here by remembering him and realizing we had survived a whole year in the storm.
After our loss others would say to me “you are so brave” and “I just don’t know how you do it”. The truth was it wasn’t bravery at all. I was a mother fueled by anger and fear. Terrified to lose another living child, I didn’t know what else to do other than go through the motions and pour into them for distraction. I did everything from volunteer at their school to their church classroom to planning a Disney vacation in order to avoid putting on a brave face. I didn’t feel brave at all, I felt like I wanted to crawl under a rock until everything was fixed.
For months after we lost John Karl we agonized over the decision to have another child? We were terrified to say goodbye to another child, yet we felt our family was still incomplete. Test results were still inconclusive as to whether it was safe for us to conceive again, or for me to carry another child.. So I began to pray, “God, I don’t know what I want. The doctors don’t know what we should do. I don’t know what I can handle. You have to decide. You have to do this for me. I just can’t anymore.” And that is how it went. Every time it crossed my mind or stressed me out, I prayed that prayer. “You decide, God. I can’t do it on my own.”
"So I began to pray, “God, I don’t know what I want. The doctors don’t know what we should do. I don’t know what I can handle. You have to decide. You have to do this for me."'
He did.
He decided.
I stood in the master bathroom holding a stick I just peed on, and then fell to the floor. Not passed-out-fall-to-the-floor, but knocked-over-fall-on-the-floor. Knocked over. I imagined this moment before over the last year. In my imagination I would do this with my husband by my side because I was going to be terrified to get this news. I wasn’t. God decided this. I felt the glory of the Lord pour down on me. No exaggeration, I felt it wash over me like the perfect pitcher of milk and honey described in Scripture.
We faced 37 long weeks of a high risk pregnancy and let me tell you, Jesus never left my side. I had panic attacks before nearly every appointment - and there were many! Our high risk pregnancy and the unknown coming were monitored weekly from week 3-15, then twice a week, then three times a week, until I was admitted days before. Sometimes I was so fearful I failed to see that God was carrying us through with a positive report at each and every appointment.
Looking back, I saw the Lord show up with more bravery than I could ever carry. The Creator showed up BIG. Sometimes in a kind word of encouragement from my doctor, or a friend who offered to attend every appointment with me when my husband couldn’t get away from work, others who prayed for us fervently without our knowledge. Slowly, my fear subsided, and I felt reminded of David facing the giant, Goliath. Can you imagine walking over the edge of the mountain to see a man still standing heads taller and larger than you and you’re expected to fight him - and WIN?! I read and reread that story in 1 Samuel 17 and slowly climbed my way from the Valley of the Shadow of Death, never ever forgetting the sweet son we still mourned, but thankful and trusting of the life the Lord had blessed us to grow.
"I read and reread that story in 1 Samuel 17 and slowly climbed my way from the Valley of the Shadow of Death, never ever forgetting the sweet son we still mourned, but thankful and trusting of the life the Lord had blessed us to grow."
We repeated Psalm 23:4 and the mantra, “Let your faith be bigger than your fear” more times than I can possibly count. I was reminded of a Man who always knew this plan for us, and I learned that His bravery was strength enough for us all.
Bring the joy, leave the fear.
On June 18, 2016 our bravery helped us bring our second son into the world, safe and sound. This little one has been a living, breathing, running, climbing, jumping reminder of God’s faithfulness when fear is real. When I don’t know what is next, or I feel the twinge of fear tighten my chest, I watch this sweet, thriving, curly-haired redhead for a moment, and I am reminded His bravery abounds.
About Misty
Misty Oerther is a writer and speaker who can be found at www.mistyoerther.com, as well as on Facebook and Instagram. She loves Jesus, her husband, and her four children with loyalty and enthusiasm. She mothers three children at home and one in the arms of Jesus. Misty has spent a good part of her life in front of an audience as a trainer, teacher, and educator. While currently working full time in the education field, she also enjoys planning magical vacations at her part-time business: Misty Oerther, Simply Enchanted Travel. Her extroverted personality drives quick connections with others. She will do just about anything for a laugh, often at the expense of her own embarrassment, and packs a little punch of sarcasm and sass as a dynamic storyteller.
Brave Woman Manifesto
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